Thursday, 21 February 2013



again, I am a disappointment. I seem to have disappointed a lot of people lately. Regardless of what I did, I am always a disappointment. I always fail to live up to expectations. Nothing new there! I am also disappointed with myself! I wish I could tell everybody that "hey, I know I am a disappointment, I know! I have been told so many times, so I know!

I am sorry!

May Allah give us the strength, wisdom and eman. Amen

speak soon
love x



InshaAllah all is well.

I find really difficult telling people how I really feel. Most of the time, I fail to tell them how I feel or what I want to do or not want to do. Because of this I feel depressed, angry, and sad. I am angry with myself. Why can't I just tell them that I don't want to do it. Because of my inability to tell people how I really feel, I am always placed in an awkward position, even worst I feel miserable and angry all the time!

How should I say it?

Okay scenario one:
Tell that person straight to his/her face:
Ehm... you know...bla..bla...It's driving me mad! I don't want to do it. I don't like doing it. I am not interested ! full stop. Please let me do what I want to do..please leave me alone and stop breathing down my neck! get off my back!!

Scenario two:
Ehm.. you know I hate it when I get told off for doing it wrong when I have no ideas how to do it in the first place. If you want to do it, do it yourself. leave me out of it! I have told you so many times, I hate doing this, I don't want to do this. Please understand and respect my decision!

Scenario three:
Keep bottling it in! Coward!!

Ya Allah, please  grant me the iman, strength, wisdom and patience to face this challenge. Ya Rabbi! Ya Kareem!

may Allah protect us all! Ameen..

speak soon!
love xx